Monday, August 8, 2016

It is official. One year down.

So, we made it. One year down.

Actually, it has been just over a year, if we are nitpicking. I don't count our lost month as living in Los Angeles. I just count that as a glorious month of living my absolute dream. At the time I was freaking the fuck out. How could I not? We had no plans for our return to Los Angeles, and we were dipping into our savings that should have been used to help us stay afloat in LA. But I digress. Oh, how I wish I could go back to that road trip and relive it and enjoy it for what it was; the dream, our dream. More on that to come, if I ever get around to it. I promise, I totally will.

In all actuality, I cannot believe we made it a year. 

Prior to moving to Los Angeles, I knew we could do it. Our last year in Austin was all about California dreaming. It was all about saving, saving, and some more saving complemented by selling, selling, and some more selling of our shit. During this time I was talking myself into believing that this move to Los Angeles was going to be as easy as pie. We were just going to slip into this large-ass city quietly. We were going to find an apartment with ease. We were going to find jobs with no problem. We are two able-bodied adults from the Midwest, and it's easy for Midwesterners to find jobs anywhere. Ugh, I fall for that old line every time. So naive, I am. 

I did the same thing when we moved to Austin - this thinking that it will be so easy adjusting to a new city and finding work with ease. Usually, when a family member hears of our plans to move they always reassure us that it will be so easy for us to find work because we are from the Midwest and who doesn't want to hire someone from the Midwest? NO ONE CARES THAT WE ARE FROM THE MIDWEST!

However, the husband and I have been quite lucky. We did find work fairly early on. When I look back, I realize that I found my job within a month and a half of settling in. And the husband was able to use a friend of a friend to find work soon after. A lot of people we meet who are new to this city seem to have a harder time finding work. We had some luck on our side. 

At the time, last year, it felt like we were never going to find jobs. The month and a half that I wasn't working was actually longer because we were also dealing with our lost month of July. It did feel like forever to the two of us. It felt strange not to be working, especially since I've always worked - like the rest of human population - and I kind of liked not working. Except for the part of not having money coming in. We did have savings, but this city isn't cheap. We aren't dealing with Austin prices anymore. 

Here we are. One year later. 

We are both back at the beginning, overeducated and underemployed. Starting out at the bottom again. But that's par for the course with Gen X-ers - or whatever the fuck we are, because I can never figure that out and all I know is that we are in that sweet spot where none of this really matters - with our degrees in English.

I am back in a kitchen, which isn't my dream, but it pays the bills and that's all that matters right now because we suck at budgeting. And the husband is doing odd PA jobs around town. Again, it isn't the dream, but it pays the bills. And that is where we are at right now. 

I am proud to say that we haven't had to pack up and mosey on back to Austin, which had been a fear of mine. As great of a town as Austin is, it's a town that is really hard to get anything done - again, just for us. Many of people have accomplished plenty in that great city of Austin, but we just could not. I have heard of Austin being compared to Never-Never Land before, and I agree totally. It's easy to live a life of underemployment comfortably there. So, we left and the struggle is now real. But isn't the struggle supposed to help with the creativity? 

Isn't there that saying, what doesn't kill us will only make us stronger? At this point, I hope so. Otherwise why the fuck are we doing this? 

We have pretty much run out of savings. So that is freaking me out. But hopefully we can pull in some more money with promotions or just better jobs in general. Always on the lookout for something better, A.K.A. something that pays more. With the minimum wage going up in this city, things should pan out for better paying jobs. We'll see. We really need to become better hustlers. Everyone here who is doing something is hustling, and we need to tap into that mindset. I still think our Midwestern way of thinking that things will come to us because we are hard workers is getting in the way. We need to make our own way. We need to hustle.   

One year. Holy fuck, one year. 

I don't feel like a Californian, yet. I do absolutely love this state and cannot wait until I feel like I totally belong.



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